Waves in Siva Saagaram

India has continuously borne countless sages in her divine womb down the ages. Among these is Sri Sivan SAR, one of her spiritual sons, whose abundant grace blessed and guided many in the twentieth century. I first heard of Sri SAR from a friend, about twenty-five years ago.

This led to my first darshan of Him at the residence of Sri Nathan, of Nathan's Café. When I was in His divine presence, I was instructed to read out from a copy of His magnum opus, Yenipadigalil Maanthargal and also to visit Him regularly thereafter.

A few years later, Sri Triplicane Periyava gave me His divine instruction to read Yenipadigalil Maanthargal every morning, just as we would read the Ramayana and the BhAgavatha Puranam, as a sequel to our daily, ritualistic worship. Never have I ever seen such a book, nor would I possibly see one such again in this birth. It was indeed a blessing to have His darshan often. In one such instance, I was there at about ten at night, after delivering an `upany Asam' or spiritual discourse on Sivarathri day. Sri SAR sat in His usual unassuming manner, while hundreds of red ants ran all over and around His feet. Startled, I asked Sri SAR if I should brush them away, but He gestured not to. After five minutes, He said, "They're doing exactly what we do. They're searching for food." Only the Enlightened see the Ultimate Truth in all.

It was the 8th of January, 1994 about 2.30 in the afternoon. I said that I had not had Sri Maha Periyava's darshan for quite a long time. Sri SAR replied that Periyava Himself had not been giving darshan to the devotees. Suddenly, He remarked, "A shirt is meant to be discarded, whether it is made of skin or of cloth". A few minutes later, a phone call conveyed the news that Sri Maha Periyava had shed His mortal coil.

At once, "Today is an important day, leave for Kanchipuram at once," ordered Sri SAR. From the little room where He resided, Sri SAR could foresee all the events of the world. He would, from time to time, hint about these to the blessed few who had been closely associated with Him down the years. Having made the habit of reading Yenipadigalil Maanthargal every day, I used to draw upon information in it in appropriate contexts, during my discourses. One day - an unusual one - I went to have Sri SAW s darshan before an upanyAsam as I was wont to.

Usually during such visits, He would say "Duty first" and would permit me to leave at once. But that day, He spoke to me for half an hour. "I heard that you have been sharing references from my book in your upanyAsams, isn't that so?" I said "Yes."

"Did you mention that it was the book written by me? "

"No SAR, I have been sharing the contents and its messages without citing the source. "Shouldn't you be acknowledging the source?

My penance of forty years is in this book." He declared emphatically.

"SAR, you do not like publicity, that's why I didn't mention", I replied.

Sri SAR's reply was firm. "Yes, true, but it is everyone's responsibility to acknowledge the source." Spontaneously, I related the significance of His message to a sacred verse in the SkAndam. The sloka says "guru ❑ prakasayehdhiman mantra ❑

yatnena gopayet..." which means "It is the duty of a disciple to eulogize the Greatness of His Guru, yet carefully guard the mantras obtained."

Sri SAR decided to shed His mortal coil in the year 1996. To be bestowed with the blessings of both Sri Maha Periyava and Sri SAR in the same lifetime, is indeed a rare privilege, though the lingering sadness of having failed to surrender completely at their feet, prompts me to confess my regret. Had I done so, salvation would have easily been mine It gives me immense joy to see that Sri Ganesa Sarma, along with Sri Sivaraman has been able to compile excerpts from this great soul's life into a book.

Although Sri Sivaraman requested me twice to write the prologue, the leisure to do so delayed it. I was informed that the printing had not started and so could now write a few lines, which I humbly acknowledge as a sign of Sri SAR's grace. I submit the foreword as a token of my wholehearted gratitude to Sri SAR.

The doting mother nourishes her infant with milk. Is it possible to for us to understand why or necessary even, to reason such divine love? When I was told to write the biography of Sri Sivan SAR, I took to it in a spirit akin to this, wherein love needs no reason for its expression. We do realize that everything is by His will and that nothing lies in our hands. Why then hesitate or fear?

Sri Maha Periyava was extremely dear to our Guru, Sri `Pradosham' Mama. He had abundant reverence and regard for the three great MahAns: Sri Sivan SAR, Sri Aangarai Periyava and Sri Musiri Dlkshitar. Pradosham Mama would ask all those who come to visit Him, to have darshan of these three great souls and pay due reverences, but He sent me only to two of them and not to Sri SAR! I could not figure out why!

SRI SIVAN SAR and MAHA PERIYAVA, NOT TWO BUT ONE!

I had once gone to Sri Sivaraman's (of Sankara Nethralaya) home in Virugambakkam, Chennai, to discourse on Sri Maha Periyava's greatness. I had the good fortune of listening to Sri Sivaraman and his wife Smt. Gowri talking about Sri Sivan SAR and felt deeply moved. I wanted at least to have a photo of SAR. I asked them if they could give me one. Smt. Gowri searched inside her bag but what she got was Sri Maha Periyava's photo. She tried once again but only Periyava's photo came out for the second time! So she told me, "Only Periyava has come out, twice! You better keep His photo for now".

It would have been after all reasonably expected of me to question myself thus 'Why, why should I not get a photograph of SAR ? Am I not qualified for this?' However, it was not so. Instead, I wondered if this could have been a drama to make me realize that both are one and the same. Moreover, I was happy that Periyava was holding onto me and not letting go of me! This is not a product of my imagination nor consolation, but it is to me a confirmed truth. I should give you one more such proof.

Sri Supni, Subramaniam of ThiruvenkAdu, one of Sri SAR's disciples, had been requesting Him for three years to take him for darshan of His elder brother. SAR's reply was, "You have seen me, haven't you? That is enough. It equates to seeing Him."

Sri. Supni never had darshan of Sri Maha Periyava when He graced in physical form. Perhaps many find this new altogether, this fact of Sri Sivan SAR and Sri Maha Periyava being not two different persons but one and the same. Therefore, I'm obliged to cite one more example. Once Sri. Balakrishnan, elder brother of Dr. Padma Subramaniam, and his wife could not go to Kanchipuram for Periyava's Jayanthi. They prostrated before SAR, and told Him, "It is Periyava's Jayanthi. We are doing Namaskaram to you, thinking of Him." Sri SAR replied, "Periyava has accepted the namaskaram you have done here today".

Sri 'Photo' Kannan, once gave a photo of Sri Sivan SAR to SAttur Ramanan. Ramanan took it to Periyava. As he held it, Periyava said with delight, "Do you know who He is? My younger brother! Keep this photo in your puja room, next to mine " Does not this divine instruction prove that both of them are one and the same?

Once when Periyava saw that 'Photo' Kannan - who had been blessed to take many photographs of Sri Maha Periyava -had taken a photo of Sri Sivan SAR, He remarked "From being my personal photographer, you have been promoted as the family photographer!

"What can I say about Sri Maha Periyava's compassion, who made this fool such as I to speak about, write and even sing His glory? By making me write about the greatness of a member of His 'family', He has thus transformed me to be a servant of His `family' !

`Giving thyself unto me, you have taken myself unto you' (Thanthathu undhanai, kondadhu endhanai) sung the Poet MAnikkavAchakar. But, here, Periyava has even accepted me into His family to me and took mine, while showering His blessings upon me all along. What will suffice in return, than to melt in absolute gratitude for all that He has done?

My heartful thanks to Sri Sivaraman and Sri Supni, both of whom were the catalysts to motivate me to write Sri Sivan SAR's biography. My heartful thanks to all those benevolent persons who readily shared a lot of information regarding Sri SAR. I also thank the publishers of this book, and all those who are blessed to be the disciples and devotees of the MahAn.

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